Friday, May 22, 2015
I'm cheating with this selfie--I no longer have my beard. The beard lasted several months, however, before skin irritation compelled me to expel it. I was surprised it lasted that long.
Anyway, I'm 58. One of the scarier things about birthdays is that we're always one year older than the age we declare. To wit, at "58," I am in fact starting my 59th year. Not only am I starting my 59th year, I am in fact in my sixth decade, not my fifth.
Think about it: when we're 10, for instance, we're starting our second decade. 20, our third. And so on. We age ahead of ourselves. So, every time you ask yourself the birthday question, "Am I really that old?" you are, in fact, even older than that. I have no idea what I just typed--it sounded good in my head.
Sirens. The Italics Police are coming for me. I mean, the Italics Police.
Tuesday, May 19, 2015
"I PEE ON TV MONITORS!!"--WESLEY
There you have it--Wesley's confession. Actually, he hasn't confessed to anything, nor has he shown an ounce of remorse. (He's a cat.) And, technically, he peed under the monitor, but that's all it took to kill the audio and video. Now all we have, post-pee, is a fuzzy white image that just sits there, doing nothing. The monitor is fairly new. Was, I mean.
So I figured that some on-line shaming might work. Let's just hope Wesley comes across this page, sees himself (and the account of his deed), and feels really bad. In fact, I'll just leave this page up on Bev's PC, saving Wesley the trouble of a search.
Yes, Wesley. That's YOU. The cat who peed on the TV monitor.
YOU did it. YOU.
This experiment in on-line cat-shaming was brought to you by MY(P)WHAE.
Thursday, May 14, 2015
The handsome character on the right is John Blazo, who was Pat Ryan #2 on Ryan's Hope, my favorite soap (of the two soaps I like--the other being Dark Shadows). I wish they'd kept him longer than a year and some months, but they wouldn't listen to me, especially given that the show had been off the air for nearly 20 years by the time I saw it. A little late to be protesting a recast decision, I suppose. Anyway, I thought John was marvelous.
I'd read that John was performing cabaret-style jazz, and I've long been on the lookout for same. No luck, but then Youtube came to the rescue with fourteen Blazo tracks, uploaded by John himself:
John sings, backed by a virtuoso jazz trio (guitar, piano, and bass). Great stuff!
Monday, May 11, 2015
The conga cats are (left to right): Wesley, James, Fidel, and Sarge. That's the classic Sarge face.
Notice that this is the Max Raffler painting featured in the last post, only with modified mugshots.
Meanwhile, my Lots o' Cats Rag is at SoundCloud. I wrote it circa 1992:
Lots o' Cats Rag
Sunday, May 10, 2015
If Einstein were alive today, and he wanted to be taken seriously by Millennials, he'd have to do stand-up. Relativity, Schmelativity. Does he have a background in "improv"?
If Darwin were alive today, and he saw a FFRF "Praise Darwin" billboard, he'd say, "Freedom from Religion? Are these people illiterate?"
If Jefferson were alive today, he'd say, "You're kidding! Everyone gets to vote? What country is this?"
If Birth of a Nation is such a bedrock classic of cinema, why would no one in his or her right mind remake it today? I had to watch that wretched thing in a film class, and it had me rethinking my major (Popular Culture).
Whenever a reality-based person insists that his or her claims are "based on science," I'm not impressed. You see, I only sign on to claims that are endorsed by 9 out of 10 doctors.
Science, of course, exists to endorse ideas and claims. Some people think it exists to test things, but I don't know where they got that silly idea.
I was thinking of becoming a Faith Voter for Hillary, but then I remembered that the Establishment Clause forbids faith voting. Unless MSNBC is pulling my leg.
Besides, is it "Faith Voters for Hillary" or "FaithVoters4Hillary"? I want to know what I'm joining.
By the way, I think Hillary will win, but only despite the best efforts of my party (Democrats). Nothing like two-party opposition to bring out the fight in a candidate.
Is one's opportunities for social mobility better as a U.S. citizen or a member of a bee colony? According to studies, approximately the same. I'm leaning toward bee colony.
I've been trying to pinpoint the exact moment in pop culture history when "The Beatles" became "John Lennon," but no luck so far. Back in my day, "The Beatles" were John, Paul, George, and Ringo. That dates me, I realize.
Getting old is not for sissies. That's why sissies, on average, die around 30.
There's an "argument from evil" that's used to disprove God. It's beastly clever, because it involves using arguments of faith against themselves. That's an awesome strategy! And original, too.
I remember when feminism had something to do with compelling society to take women as seriously as we take men. Then came the Internet, and now "feminist" seems to mean "hooker." As in, doing your best impression of one on-line. Because acting that way is empowering. Not to women, but to someone.
If Einstein were alive today, and he wanted.... Oops. Already did that one.
By the way, I'm practicing the modern style of using short sentences. Or trying to, anyway. It'll take time. Wish me luck. See you.