Of course, no one bought this for the cover. (Cue laugh track) Rather, buyers were studying the back cover and its track listing, not to mention savoring the cut-rate liner notes. The music on this LP consists of very familiar (but fine) concert works. They include two by Tchaikovsky--Theme From Piano Concerto and Flower Waltz. The former is one of my favorite works. "The pieces I love best? Oh, Theme From Piano Concerto. That's got to be near the top of the list."--Me, discussing music.
You know, this thing is almost like a forerunner of all those Greatest Music of All Time-type offers on TV. The ones with badly edited Bizet, Beethoven, and Mozart moments in questionable stereo.
The photo must be stock--it says, "5050 Printed in U.S.A." That's one clue. I personally find the flowers in the upper r.h. corner to be obtrusive, though they blend in more naturally in person, so to speak. On the actual cover, that is. It's certainly a superior photo for a junk label, though Columbia would probably have said no. As opposed to the pretty model, who's clearly saying yes. Or so Palace would have wanted us guys to think. After all, they're using her to sell this thing. You don't go for subtle tactics when you're selling your LPs in supermarkets.
And, to my surprise, both the performances and recording quality are very good. I didn't realize Palace put out anything that sounded good, so this is kind of a shock, almost. And the European orchestra (or orchestras) performing these treasured favorites could be forgiven for phoning in their performances--they had no royalties coming--but the musicians turn in fine work.
So, this LP is definitely not the terrible and/or hokey experience I was anticipating, and I'm almost disappointed. It's almost (but not quite) like, "Darn! I expected this to suck!"
However, there's some junk-budget hilarity to be found on the jacket and labels. For instance, are you, like me, a huge fan of Chopin's Clair de Lune? And were you, like me, under the impression that Debussy wrote it? Well, not according to the label. And why on earth did Palace use such substandard white ink on its labels? We're talking a brittle, almost chalky kind of ink (some failed experiment that Palace bought up, cheap), and I don't think the vintage of the LP is the cause, given that the lettering is bright and clear and the white perfectly Downy-white. No obvious signs of aging here:
I'm almost afraid some of the label's almost-ink might chip off in cyberspace. Better not touch the screen, just to be on the safe side.
Flower Waltz is an ink-saving alternative to Waltz of the Flowers, so I'll give that a pass. But I can't give a pass to the classically confusing artist credits: Fontanna and Viennese Symphonic Orchestras. Or, if you prefer the label credit, Fontanna and the Viennese Symphonic Orchestra. Singular. Now, is this Fontanna plus an unspecified number of Viennese symphonic orchestras? Or is Fontanna doing all the conducting? I realize it doesn't matter, but these credits are the essence of junk label carelessness. A prime example of saving money on quality control by not having any.
I have this scene in my head of Fontanna rushing between studios to conduct four different Viennese symphonic orchestras. He hops in a taxi, then he realizes he forgot his baton, so he rushes back, then he returns and says, "All this trouble for a lousy supermarket LP!" To which the taxi driver replies, "Tschuldigung?" (Austrian German for "Pardon me?")
This LP is as relaxing and pleasing as can be, its only awkward moment happening at the end of Theme From Piano Concerto, with the engineer clearly unsure of exactly where to do the fade. I wouldn't have been sure, either.
IMPORTANT: This is a "Complete Audible Range" LP. The high end is 25,000 Hz. And the moon is a planet, and Madonna is any director's next pick if Meryl Streep is unavailable.
12 comments:
My Christmas LP collection has a bunch of Fontanna stuff. (Can anyone say Masterseal?) And the same music shows up under other names elsewhere, of course. All the covers look like catalog leftovers/outtakes, which means that I love them immensely.
Lee - I have kind of a glow myself, but put it down to the beer.
Diane - Fontanna does show up a lot in the bargain bins. I was never sure if he or she was a real person or just some catch-all, double-n name these companies used for their more high-toned releases.
Diane,
As you might guess, Palace and Masterseal were part of the same label group. I'm going to check Discogs to see how many co-releases there were. A lot of the stuff re-re-re-re-cycled on the junk label Xmas LPs are older tracks, sometimes from labels acquired by other labels. One of the Top label's endlessly recycled tracks originated as a single on the Lincoln label, and it hopped around the cheapo label groups (Treasure, et al.). And I know that SPC absorbed some early-50s labels. I think I have three Fontanna Xmas LPs, and I'm sure they have a good deal of track overlap. I tend to think Fontanna was made up. It's also possible there was a real Fontanna whose name--in the tradition of Elliot Everett--was hauled out for generic-credit use. Elliot was part of Eli Oberstein's name, and it was used as an alias on Victor Records as early as 1932. Anyway, I love putting up common thrift items (Fontanna, fake hits, etc.), because they're mostly things people encounter often but have probably never heard. I give them audio life. (Sounds noble, no?)
Buster--
If only my med regimen permitted alcohol. I love beer. In moderation--though I work up a high tolerance pretty quickly. I was relieved to learn from my doctor that tolerance does not equal dependence. I'm no more likely to become an alcoholic than someone who gets silly after two beers. And, since I don't drink, it's not an issue!
Lee - We need more of your Organ Tunes of Great Music and Compositions sometime Please & Thanks.. Yes I too have kind of an inner glow myself, but put it down mostly to The Hard Celebrity Liquors, Some Wines & All Of Those Different Tasty Beers.
Yes you certainly have done a fine job here on this Old Photograph Picture on this Album Cover, There's No obvious signs of aging here, nor with you Lee. I liked your Halloween Tunes and Music Albums. We All are thoroughly enjoying your Organ Tunes along with the Old and New Albums and the Music's Quality of Sound Reproduction. Between you Lee along with Buster and Ernie it has been a very enjoyable Holiday Seasons and as you know with this Terrible Covid-19 Virus for the past year All of you men have helped out everyone's spirit's to cope with the days. Please Guys, Keep up all of your great work, my ears are very happy hearing many new and exciting melodies and sounds. I Thank You All. Stay Safe and Avid The Covid Virus if at all possible.
FYI-I think the flowers are bougainvillea, a pretty common bush around these parts. They come in lots of cool colors, and the vines can get huge.
Stan S.,
I'd be happy to repost some of my own stuff--I guess I worry about boring people with vanity posts, but it's lovely to hear your kind words. I'd been thinking of putting up my "Facebook Suite" or some of my ragtime pieces. For a while, about 1995, I was challenging myself to write a rag per hour, and I found I could do it. Well, with step-time entry, at least. You stay safe, too, and again, thanks for your generous words!
Ernie,
Thanks for that i.d. I do think the photographer could have positioned them a little further from her face, but it's a decent photo. It almost makes the LP look non-budget!
Hi Lee, I really liked this album. I love instrumentals as I said before.
After I set up my new computer this was the first download. I was waiting for days to download it. Bryan
Bryan,
Glad you enjoyed it! This LP surprised me with its quality. Did your previous PC bite the dust, or did you upgrade?
Hi Lee, this Tchaikovsky is the Herbert von Karajan, Vienna Symphony Orchestra, Sviatoslav Richter – Piano Concerto No. 1 In B Flat Minor, Op. 23 from a 1962 issued DGG album. I have this album on sowiet Melodiya reissue. This is a brilliant quality record, tipical german "prezisität". But these Fonatana version is too loud and dynamicless (comprimed).
https://www.discogs.com/Tchaikovsky-Herbert-Von-Karajan-Vienna-Symphony-Orchestra-Sviatoslav-Richter-Piano-Concerto-No-1-In-/release/6487909
Peter
Peter,
Thanks! But I wonder how on earth the Palace label got the rights to a 1962 Deutsche Grammophon recording? The release years couldn't have been that far apart. I wonder if this is an instance of piracy?
Lee,
I have the DG issue of this myself. Palace possibly got a Melodiya pressing labeled in Cyrillic, didn't know the provenance, and pirated away.
I wonder if the Melodiya itself was pirated.
Hm. That's an interesting possibility!
Post a Comment