Current Hits, Volume No. 12--Featuring "I Want to Hold Your Hand" (1964)

 

Utterly classic cover.  From 1964, and another gift from Diane (thanks, Diane!)--this time, from a discount box in a record store, if my memory isn't malfunctioning.  And what a subtle Fab Four cash-in, no?  Big white-against-brown font: "Featuring 'I Want to Hold Your Hand.'"  To the left of the track titles, a generic Beatle.  Clearly, a rush-job cash-in.

Classic liner text: "It seems that not one single soul in the country, or for that matter the world, could possibly be oblivious to the fact that I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND is the hit record of the year.  It's a product of the beatle haircut and a strange new disease that has swept England and is now hitting our country, known as 'beatleism' or 'beatlemania.'  Not since the early days of Elvis Presley has there been a hit song that has generated as much excitement as I WANT TO HOLD YOUR HAND.  Man, if you're alive and under a 105, and this song doesn't move you something is wrong!  This recording alone is worth the whole price of the album.  Don't be the last to know, pick it up, pay the man, and take it home--now!"  Now--not tomorrow, not next week, not sometime next month.  NOW!

Someone skipped high school English, I think.  Anyway, none of the punctuation or (lack of) capitalization is mine--why "beatleism" and "beatlemania"?  And who the heck ever heard of "beatleism," anyway?  But, there we have it--the notes telling us to buy this LP so we can get our copy of I Want to Hold Your Hand.  Which is actually their copy of the song, literally.  How masterfully Hit Records obscures the distinction between the actual recording and their knock-off thereof.

I love the last-minute-cash-in nature of this release.  We can only imagine that this was going to be just another Current Hits collection--but then, the Beatles seized the charts.  Panic time!  And we have some typical budget-label inconsistency here, with the reverse jacket saying "Current Hits--Volume 12," while the front portion announces, "Current Hits--Volume No. 12."  Anyway, I can imagine someone saying, "Quick!  Make this all about 'beatleism," and put one of those long-haired guys on the cover--over here on the left, where there's room."  Beatleism.  Sounds like a philosophy.  ("All you need is love."  "Hey, you sound like a beatlist.")

Too bad this version of Hand (credited to "The Doodles" on the 45 release) isn't very good.  Now, it is delightful in its amateurishness--almost like a group of singers imitating the New Seekers (exhausted after a two-week tour) badly imitating the Beatles--but it can only be described as lame.  I've had it on 45 forever, and I've always liked it, in the way that one likes a nice-try-but-keep-your-day-job fake hit, but it's hilarious to see it serving as the LP headliner.  The other eleven tracks, which run the gamut from "ouch!" to highly competent, are actually more fun.

And, almost hilariously, the LP line-up corresponds to the release schedule of the 45s--and I've placed the 45 rpm credits on the mp3 ID tags (the LP forgoes artist credits).  Forget Him, a hit for Bobby Rydell, is adequately sung by... Bobby Russell, maybe?... and Jan and Dean's Drag City is only moderately botched by The Jalopy Five.  For some reason, I like the Hit Records attempts at the surf and hot rod genre, despite the fact they never did them very well.  As Usual is Betty Williams imitating Brenda Lee out of key, and I somehow knew this had to be a Lee hit, even though I don't remember it from bitd (back in the day).  And, though The Boy Next Door has nothing to do with the Meet Me in St. Louis classic, it's an excellent girl-group side and pretty expertly covered by the Belles (and originally done by The Secrets).  It's cowritten by John L. Medora (aka Johnny Madara), a songwriter maybe best known for At the Hop. Medora also cowrote the classic Lesley Gore hit, You Don't Own Me, done here by Bill Austin (!!), according to the single release.  But it's clearly a female vocalist, and the Hit Records Project reports that the vocalist is, in real life, Connie Dee (real name: Connie Sue Landers).  She does a fine, get-it-done-quick job.  The two soul sides--Um Um Um Um Um Um and Talking About My Baby--are solid covers, too, whereas Rick Nelson's For You is... not so fine.  Covering Rick is Ed Hardin (Bobby Russell?) who can't seem to get the notes right on the bridge of this 1930 classic by Joe Burke and Al Dubin (which was memorably recorded by the Ravens in 1947).  Hey Little Cobra is another badly done but infectious and charming cover (this time, by the Roamers, copying the Rip Chords), with the group at least properly negotiating the key changes.  Daisy Petal Picking is nicely done, though this Jimmy Gilmer and the Fireballs hit doesn't really do much for me.  Then we have an Andy Williams hit, A Fool Never Learns, sung in Elvis style by Fred York, and I have no idea why.  (Though, actually, it would have made a nice Elvis single.)  My first reaction was, "Is this an Elvis hit I didn't know about?"  Answer: no.

And all of this has something to do with "beatleism" taking over the world.  A classic, "Quick!  Change the cover!" fake-hits collection.  Thanks again to Diane for finding this--I had been wanting to have it.

And I forgot to note--Elvis lead guitarist Scotty Moore was one of the engineers on this release!

DOWNLOAD: Current Hits--Volume No. 12 (Hit Records HLP 412; 1964)

Forget Him--Wayne Harris
Drag City--The Jalopy Five
As Usual--Betty Williams
The Boy Next Door (Madara-White)--The Belles
Hey Little Cobra--The Roamers
Daisy Petal Picking (sic)--Ricky Dickens
For You (incorrectly credited to "J. Bert" and "A. Bubin")--Ed Hardin
Um Um Um Um Um Um--Thomas Henry
A Fool Never Learns--Fred York
I Want to Hold Your Hand--The Doodles
You Don't Own Me--Conne Dee (Connie Sue Landers)
Talking About My Baby--Harvey Frolic

Current Hits--Volume No. 12 (Hit Records HLP 412; 1964)

Lee